"A state of intense longing for union with another. Passionate love is a complex functional whole including appraisals or appreciations, subjective feelings, expressions, patterned physiological processes, action tendencies, and instrumental behaviors. Reciprocated love (union with the other) is associated with fulfillment and ecstasy. Unrequited love (separation) with emptiness, anxiety, or despair" --Elaine Hatfield
This is the danger of passionate love. It's beauty and the feelings it provides are unmatched, and activate the same parts of the brain as cocaine. At the same time, it can cause anxiety and agony at the same severity. This feeling often comes in the early stages of a relationship, and usually endures through years of a good marriage.
Additionally, there is compassion. Lynne G. Underwood theorized that there are 5 main factors in compassionate love. They are free choice for the other, some degree of accurate cognitive understanding of the situation, the other, and oneself, valuing the other at a fundamental level, openness and receptivity, and response of the heart. Compassionate love creates lasting bonds, and is found more often in long-term relationships.
Compassion can be created in new relationships too, provided both partners can make these aspects factors in their relationship.
Free choice for the other. The "other" here meaning the other person in your relationship. This means to not be possessive of your partner. Don't make them feel as though they have to ask you for permission before making a personal decision. Trust them enough that jealousy doesn't control your relationship.
Some degree of accurate cognitive understanding of the situation, the other, and oneself. This is to comprehend what kind of relationship you're in, and how both you and your partner feel about the relationship. Awareness of yours and your partners feelings in general is crucial.
Valuing the other at a fundamental level. This is feeling as though your significant other is worth it; your time, money, energy. Worth everything that goes into having a good relationship.
Openness and receptivity. This is making sure that both partners are open to expressing how they feel in any situation. Also that both are open to listening to each other without jumping to conclusions, getting upset, or judging their partner.
Response of the heart. This is the feeling of romance. Anyone could follow all these steps to a T and it wouldn't matter if both partners don't feel something for each other.
Passion is still important, so to say that it should be avoided altogether would be incorrect. Passionate love keeps a love life exciting and new and enduring throughout many years. That being said don't allow passion to get in the way of your and your partner's wellbeing. Allow the excitement of passion to coexist with the awareness of compassionate love.
This is the danger of passionate love. It's beauty and the feelings it provides are unmatched, and activate the same parts of the brain as cocaine. At the same time, it can cause anxiety and agony at the same severity. This feeling often comes in the early stages of a relationship, and usually endures through years of a good marriage.
Additionally, there is compassion. Lynne G. Underwood theorized that there are 5 main factors in compassionate love. They are free choice for the other, some degree of accurate cognitive understanding of the situation, the other, and oneself, valuing the other at a fundamental level, openness and receptivity, and response of the heart. Compassionate love creates lasting bonds, and is found more often in long-term relationships.
Compassion can be created in new relationships too, provided both partners can make these aspects factors in their relationship.
Free choice for the other. The "other" here meaning the other person in your relationship. This means to not be possessive of your partner. Don't make them feel as though they have to ask you for permission before making a personal decision. Trust them enough that jealousy doesn't control your relationship.
Some degree of accurate cognitive understanding of the situation, the other, and oneself. This is to comprehend what kind of relationship you're in, and how both you and your partner feel about the relationship. Awareness of yours and your partners feelings in general is crucial.
Valuing the other at a fundamental level. This is feeling as though your significant other is worth it; your time, money, energy. Worth everything that goes into having a good relationship.
Openness and receptivity. This is making sure that both partners are open to expressing how they feel in any situation. Also that both are open to listening to each other without jumping to conclusions, getting upset, or judging their partner.
Response of the heart. This is the feeling of romance. Anyone could follow all these steps to a T and it wouldn't matter if both partners don't feel something for each other.
Passion is still important, so to say that it should be avoided altogether would be incorrect. Passionate love keeps a love life exciting and new and enduring throughout many years. That being said don't allow passion to get in the way of your and your partner's wellbeing. Allow the excitement of passion to coexist with the awareness of compassionate love.
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